Vows - A Promise of Love by Unknown Author |
| Posted by caspericu (admin) on May 03 2008 |
You and your fiancé are standing before your family and friends, all eyes upon you. You are dressed in the most fabulous white gown, he in a dashing tuxedo. You gaze into each others eyes, hearts full of love and anticipation for what is about to happen. Your guests silently hold their breath, wanting to hear the words that are about to be spoken – your wedding vows.
What do you want to say to your beloved? What promise do you hold in your heart? To love always, to care for in sickness and health. To honor for all eternity? Is there something else that you want to say? Perhaps you may want to write your own, or make additions to what your officiant suggests. Because of the serious nature of the wedding vows, take a cue from tradition. These are words that have been repeated for generations. Their legacy is so deeply ingrained in our culture that most people are able to recite if not all then at least portions at any given moment.
You can find inspiration from a variety of sources, such as literature, poetry and scripture. Borrow or adapt words that will best fit who you are and what you want to say. Come up with your own words too. You may prefer to simply alter the "tried-and-true" vows or want to completely write the whole thing. While this is your choice, be sure to pass this by your officiant before you start writing. He or she will most likely have some guidelines for you to follow.
And a few "rules" on vows. (1) don’t get too cute or funny. So save the promises to always take out the trash or bathe the dog for another time. And don’t make it too personal or full of inside references. Your vows, as a public declaration, should be easily understood by your guests. (2) don’t get too wordy. The solemn promise of your vows are not meant to be of epic proportions. If you are your fiancé are writing your vows separately, agree on length beforehand. It would look awkward if one of you was quick and to the point in under 60 seconds while the other is still talking at two minutes. (3) don’t think that you have to memorize your vows. Print them out on nice sturdy paper or cardstock – print large enough to comfortably see – so you can read or at least have them to refer to if you get stuck. Practice reading them a few times in front of a mirror before the big day arrives. You’ll want to make sure you won’t be stumbling over any words or getting too teary-eyed. (4) Let your officiant see your newly written vows before your wedding day. He or she might give the ok as is, or may request changes or deletions. If the latter happens, remember that they want to ensure that your vows are appropriate with the solemnity and seriousness of the occasion. Trust your officiant, who has the experience of what goes into a wedding vow. If you must remove something from your vows, but really want it said on your special day, save it for your reception.
Saying your vows is a once-in-a-lifetime thing. You won’t want to look back on your wedding day, thinking "why did I have to say THAT?" Instead, choose words that are timeless and express the love and promise of what is ahead.
